When you’re throwing away your trash or unwanted items do you ever wonder where it goes?
It’s important to remember that the stuff we throw away doesn’t go away — it goes to a landfill where it is buried … and there it stays — for years and years.
But this post isn’t about trash. This is about your personal, emotional landfill.
We all have our own emotional landfill inside of us where we bury the hurts, the disappointments and all the unresolved emotional traumas that we don’t want to deal with and, like the trash, it doesn’t go away. It stays there and pollutes our personal environment and can become fuel for our fears.
The hurt we felt the first time someone broke our heart is still there — and fuels the fear of getting too close to someone.
The disappointment we felt when we didn’t make the team is still there — and fuels the fear of not being good enough.
The rejection we felt when our parents didn’t have time to play with us is still there — and fuels the fear of not being loveable.
We bury the anger, the tears, the rejection, the grief, all of the feelings and emotions that we didn’t know how how to deal with.
We pretend that we’re fine and we cope, until one day we realize that we have a problem. Physically, mentally or emotionally, those buried traumas surface. Because burying things, whether it’s trash or feelings, doesn’t make it go away.
Like the earth we can only handle so much before we start to break down.
So what do you do when you find yourself faced with “emotional trash”?
1. Remember that they are just emotions and it’s ok to have them. I don’t think anyone has ever died from crying or screaming.
2. Recognize the meaning that you are giving the emotion. Does feeling sad mean that you are weak? You can change that meaning or give it no meaning at all.
3. Notice if you have an attachment to keeping the emotional trauma. Do you believe it keeps you safe? This is pretty common.
4. Be willing to face what you perceive to be painful, feel it, move it, replace it and be done.
I understand this sounds simplistic and actually it is. But it’s your curiosity, courage and commitment to do the work that can be challenging.
That’s why I’m here, to help you through the process of disposing of your emotional trash in a healthy way.
Good for you, good for the environment!
Call me today, start change tomorrow
Lori Barnett
858-382-4576